I am an 11th grade boy and I am dating a girl who is now a senior. We have been together for about 18 months. She says she loves me and wants to get married after we both graduate. I like her and enjoy her company, but that is it. She is extremely jealous and possessive and tries to control every situation. Crabby, to be honest, I feel no love for her. She is not overly smart, but is what I consider good looking. I will probably never get a girl as cute as her if I live to be 100, but I also wonder about what our future would be like if we got married. I would like to end it completely so we could each experience different people, but every time I try to break it off she cries and tears the heads off of all the stuffed animals I have won for her at the local fairs and carnivals. I am beginning to believe she is slightly “nuts”, which could be hereditary since most of her relatives have the same traits. How can I tell her I am not the one? — NOT THE ONE in Waterside.
DEAR NOT THE ONE:
You and this girl have very different objectives. I assume that if she has burst into tears she has already gotten your message, or is putting on an act to keep you around. . And I also assume her medications quit working a long time ago. My advice is keep as far away from this person as possible. If she likes football, don’t go to the games. If she likes McDonalds, you should always choose Burger King. If she likes Lowe’s, go to Home Depot. KEEP YOUR DISTANCE. Or, possibly if she sees you with another girl, she will leave you alone. If you are with someone else and you spot her, make sure to “snuggle up”, hold hands, and act as though you are happy. However, if you feel that to achieve closure there must be complete separation and absence, join a traveling carnival or circus. You could run one of the stuffed animal games it sounds like you are skilled at. Without any permanent address or phone number, she’ll be forced to let you go. And, whatever you do, don’t answer any texts, emails, or calls from this girl for at least a year. Better yet, get a new phone and number but don’t tell anyone, especially not friends or family. If you think this girl is clingy now, just think about the scenario after marriage. You’d probably be locked up in a dark basement or chained to a radiator in the attic.